Its all about Wives

Its all about Wives

My wife dresses to kill. She also cooks the same way.

************

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.

************

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong .

************

I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, "There was water in the carburetor."

I asked her, "Where's the car?"

She replied, "In the lake."

************

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

************

I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her.

************

My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate.

So I got myself two girlfriends.

************

Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.

************

A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"

The father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."

************

A man placed an ad in the classifieds: "Wife wanted."

The next day he received a hundred letters.

They all said the same: "You can have mine."

*************

It's not true that married men live longer than single men.

It only seems longer.

*************

Losing a wife can be very hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.

*************

A man meets a genie. The genie tells him he can ask for whatever he wants, but his mother-in-law gets double of what he gets.

The man thinks for a moment and says, Okay, give me a million dollars and beat me till I'm half dead."

**************

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.

**************